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погана сука

You're my queen

As a friend of mine once said: "And we wonder why New Jersey gets such a bad rap. Thanks, V."


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15 September 14
  • Kiddo, running out of her school towards me: I had the best day of my life today!!
  • Me: That's great!! What happened that made your day the best ever?
  • Kiddo: I found someone's wallet on the playground and I took the money!
  • Me: -_-
12 September 14

I had a disturbingly passionate sex dream about Adam Devine from Workaholics three nights ago and today he’s under my recommend people on Twitter. The NSA is tracking my thoughts.

29 August 14
I can’t do this any longer The vacuum left is so much stronger Judy, you know I’m not mad anymore

I can’t do this any longer
The vacuum left is so much stronger

Judy, you know I’m not mad anymore

23 July 14

My brain has been doing this thing lately where people I went to high school with are appearing in my dreams. Specifically, people I went to high school with who I have Facebook stalked that night. And, specifically, sex dreams. Only they’re weird sex dreams. Maybe I’m just not remembering the context but I think they’re all just whipping their dicks out at me. Like, Dan or Mike or whateverthefuck dude I didn’t even talk to once in high school are just showing me their dicks.

The thing is, you know how every person you see in a dream isn’t made up and is a person you’ve actually seen irl? Does this apply to dicks too? They all have the same dick. Whose dick is it? That’s the real question here.

4 May 14

Sorry, spring allergies, but I just don’t feel that you’re a good match for my personal brand. You’re fired. Security will escort you off the premises.

Posted: 1:09 PM

My focuses in life right now:

  • Curating the perfect makeup collection
  • Curating the perfect skin so that my perfect makeup collection will have a better canvas
  • Curating zero relationships with anyone, least of all men
Posted: 12:57 PM
lonewoolfs:

atlasofprejudice:

Europe According to Culinary Horror (2013) from Atlas of Prejudice 2 by Yanko Tsvetkov.

Sicily gets it own horror. But what does it say?

The translation of my Ukrainian last name is “salted pig fat”! The literal worst last name on earth!

lonewoolfs:

atlasofprejudice:

Europe According to Culinary Horror (2013) from Atlas of Prejudice 2 by Yanko Tsvetkov.

Sicily gets it own horror. But what does it say?

The translation of my Ukrainian last name is “salted pig fat”! The literal worst last name on earth!

(via ecstasybread)

Posted: 12:56 PM

(Source: occupt, via eyebrowgoddess)

Posted: 12:31 PM

Sometimes I worry that I’m the real life version of the character Lana Del Rey is trying to portray.

28 April 14
artmagnifique:

HIERONYMOUS BOSCH. The Temptation of St. Anthony  (detail), oil on panel.

artmagnifique:

HIERONYMOUS BOSCH. The Temptation of St. Anthony (detail), oil on panel.

Themed by Hunson. Originally by Josh