My brain has been doing this thing lately where people I went to high school with are appearing in my dreams. Specifically, people I went to high school with who I have Facebook stalked that night. And, specifically, sex dreams. Only they’re weird sex dreams. Maybe I’m just not remembering the context but I think they’re all just whipping their dicks out at me. Like, Dan or Mike or whateverthefuck dude I didn’t even talk to once in high school are just showing me their dicks.
The thing is, you know how every person you see in a dream isn’t made up and is a person you’ve actually seen irl? Does this apply to dicks too? They all have the same dick. Whose dick is it? That’s the real question here.
Sorry, spring allergies, but I just don’t feel that you’re a good match for my personal brand. You’re fired. Security will escort you off the premises.
My focuses in life right now:
Sometimes I worry that I’m the real life version of the character Lana Del Rey is trying to portray.
What I’ve been up to: